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sorry.....

sorry mom.... i know i'm wrong..sorry cause i can't say sorry to your face.... i didn't mean it.
i'm really sorry...from the bottom of my heart....
i'm such a bad daughter.... sorry.... :(
i wish tomorrow everything will be alright...

i'm so disappointed with myself.... i don't deserve such goodness.....

Writer's Block: Stardust memories

What is the your most cherished holiday memory from childhood, and why?

Back when we we're just a small kids...our parents always asked us what we want for christmas and all of them are granted....  great!
but now we're grown ups we're now the one who asked our dear parents what they want...lol....:)

sorry.. i didn't know....

sorry... i didn't know that your watching the memorial of your cousin. if you said it earlier i'll stop bugging you. yes you did mentioned that you're watching a funeral but u didn't mentioned that it's your cousin's. sorry again. hope you'll talk to me again. just want you to know that if your down or upset because of that you can throw it all to me. i'm more than willing to catch it all for you. for you to feel okay.
When I got back from Dubai last August 22, 2010... I got so bored at home there's nothing to do but to surf the internet all day. I entered this site OKCUPID.COM  and the first thing I'd noticed is geekycassie who is so cute. I sent her a message..just a simple "hi" and unexpectedly she wrote back. And we talked since then. She's so smart and intimidating, kinda..hhahahhah. She's so private..and i think that's the thing that i like about her. And that's the time that I started liking her.
She don't wanna give her email address and everything to have a communication at first.hahhahah. Then before my birthday come she disappeared and i got so upset knowing that i don't know where to contact her. Every day and night i checked that site and hoping she'll be back.
Luckily after my birthday i saw her online and i asked her straightly if i can get her email add and i succeed.hahhahha. since then we talked every night, not a long talked but at least we talked..hahhahha....
Days past and good things happened... she's checking my facebook account and added me as a friend (now were friends in fb)hahahha...week past she gave me her mobile number and we texted each other.Nice!
I almost lost her, the time that i told her that i love her (joke but half meant) then i took it back just to keep her..hahaha
There are times that she's sweet (answering my post in fb with sometimes a sweet comment from her) then the next minute she became so cold like a stranger. She's so unpredictable and mysterious.
We talked sometimes till 3 in the morning. hahaha. Which is I don't regret sleeping so late hahhhhah. I love talking to her.. so much.......
Late October she's always this person who always answered my messages which she didn't before.She started saying that she missed me she wants to talked to me.....and she likes me. but never mentioned that she love me even i'm saying "i love you" to her. So i guess she just like, a big difference in love..hahhaha but that's okay.  We even talked about crazy stuff..hahhahha.. hot stuff...lol
First week of November 2010, she started to be cold again....and then just disappeared again just like that. So i'm so upset again, I don't know what happened last minute we're so sweet and everything and then all of a sudden she's lost.
Even though all the sweetness and everything is just a few days, but for me it's feels like it's been a year.
I think i fell for her. Every morning, when i woke she's the first person that came to my mind and at night before i go to sleep she's the last person in my mind. Surely, some think i'm crazy but surely I really love her.
I just found out last Nov. 14 from the fb post of her friend that she's sick and unconscious. I'm so worried then and i don't know what to do and what to think. I want to know her conditions but there's no way. I tried asking her friend but unfortunately they don't want to give me even a single info about her.So i just waited for some update. But i  still keep on texting her hopefully she read all my messages.
Today when i opened my account on fb, while scrolling it down, i saw she had some post. "she's back".
I'm so glad that she's fine now. she mentioned also that she's been to the hospital and unconscious for 10 days (since Nov 8)(but her last text  is Nov 3), is she avoiding me? Well it doesn't matter... at least now she's safe and fine. I'm all good with that.everyday i prayed for that, and it's granted now! THANK YOU LORD.
Now I'm just hoping that she'll get back to me even a simple "hi" will do! Hope she'll talked to me sooner or later.. I'm just here waiting.

TO BE CONTINUED.....
lol

i wrote this in the middle of the night. lol
dated NOV 18 - 19, 2010
lol

Thank you God....

thank you God Cassie is okay now....She's out of the hospital just this morning...(according to what i've read in her post in facebook..hahhahha)..
i'm so happy she's finally okay... that' all that  matters to me now....
Thank You Lord..You're the Best.....

Tags:

leaving without saying goodbye...

when i woke up, the first thing  i saw is ur letter.....saying that u will miss me....first thing that came to my mind is that ur leaving the country.. i don't want to believe it but i know that it's true.....after i read ur letter i called you but ur number is already not available....but still i don't want to believe it but i feel so sad the whole day..until Saed told me that u already left the country...that ur in Switzerland already and u came to the shop yesterday to say goodbye but i'm not there, i already left the shop..and u didn't even call me......when he told  me that i feel so bad...and i cried...coz i didn't even got the chanced to say goodbye to you, so kiss u goodbye, to hug u goodbye....even sometimes u got me annoyed i still like u, ur still like my little sister... i felt so sad cuz i know we will never see each other again...i will miss ur sweetness to me..even sometime ur such a spoiled brat.....until now i feel so sad.....i'll miss you little sis..sarah....
i saw ur father and i thought it was just a joke that u left...but ur father said the it's true that u already left with ur mom.....ahhhhh..what a feeling.....i hate this.....i'll miss the "can i have my free lollipop for today?!"hay.............
i wish and hope that we will see each other again....

Writer's Block: Acquired taste

What is your favorite weird food combination? Have your friends ever tried it or do you only eat it in private?

i love dipping my french fries in an ice cream..
i love dipping my chips in an ice cream..especially spicy chips dipped in an ice cream....dipping chips in a soda
i love dipping my raw mango to a salt with chili....
:)
:D

love.....?

after a few weeks we don't communicate....i bear not to text you, call you and respond to all ur messages....in short i'm really avoiding you, ignoring you.... i bear it all..just to make it right and move on  with my life without you.. and now here u are again.....1 message from you that get my attention.....u want my advice for this?!that u want to accept ur boyfriend's wedding proposal just to get away from ur family specially to you mom...and for the sake of old times and being a friend, a good friend...i gave you my word of wisdom....(lol)....seriously i told you everything i have in mind..the consequences that i know that will come in ur way accepting the proposal with that reason.i totally disagree with that but i think i'm not in the position to stop that or hold that back....but still u know that i disagree.
i'm confused because why ur sending me a messages that u still love me...why ur doing this.....we're over...u choose him over me so why ur dong this....if only i can tell you to stop sending me messages or just tell you to leave me alone i think it will be easy....but i can't coz i know this will hurt you and i can't hurt you....i don't want to hurt you....i don't know what to do.....all i can pray and wish is for you to be ok..to make right decision that u will not regret in near future...i pray that u do what ur heart wants and can make u happy...

Writer's Block: Prone to puns

How would you describe your sense of humor in six words or less?

depends on who is around me.....sometimes...
naughty
fun
accidentally
simple

Writer's Block: Top Three

What three qualities do you like most about yourself, and why? What qualities do you like least?

3 qualities i like about me....
1.understanding......coz i always think practical....that's why a lot of my friends and lovers says that i am understanding.....lol....
2.sweet....all my lovers said.....lol
3.i don't say no......but it depends in who and what.....

what i like least is I DON'T SAY NO...... coz it's hard for me to say no especially to those people i like and i love........